About Me

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Hi! My name is MaryAnn , in a nutshell , Im just a city gal who left the city to live life in the desert with dreams and a family I love very much. Im just an artists , tryin' to live my dreams , go where they take me , and just see what happens.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Hello Wishcasters & my new Travellers !

Hello Wishcasters & I welcome my Travellers from my new TAJ=Travellin' Art Journal Series FREE e-course . I haven't wishcast in two weeks , I tried last week & my energy was off from various typical in-law B.S. LOL! Yes! I have in-laws that probably wish I wasn't in their lives LOL! Its sad though, cuz all of them live VERY unhappily and that has nothing to do with me. Neways Im feeling good this week.You know my little family we always kept to ourselves , we live in the desert ,& we had always been close when my daughter was growing up . When my daughter was born about 20yrs ago ( yikes! Im crusty LOL!) she didn't cry . She was such an amazing baby , & as she grew threw the years , my husband & I always knew we had a great kid. Because of the manipulations of my interesting mother-n-law ,she always played mind games with both her grandchildren , still does to this day.My daughter was very close to her cousin & now there not . He lives with his grandparents now , so that lets ya know whats going on there. We stay away as much as possible from all of the depressing people that live in my in-laws house,because on top of everything else , they believe that my husband & I are horrible parents,& that my daughter is a horrible grandchild, well maybe not my father n law he adores my daughter,but her grandmother won't allow her to talk to him on the phone or to take him out anywhere,she just doesn't like my daughter.My little family that was just 3 of us( & recently a new addition 3yrs ago my grandbaby Athena Rose) , we were put threw the ringer . My evil mother n law doesnt think its fair if one of her sons are happy & not the other . Well that was 20yrs of trying to be happy . My brother n law is an alcoholic,recovered heroin addict , & recently just got out of jail . I tell ya , when he was in jail thats probably the most I ever got along with my mother n law . Then he got out , & evil M-n-L,is back on her everyone needs to be losers again,everyone needs to be unhappy.Sorry for telling a story,I guess you people are the only ones I can talk to & your always so nice , & make me realize that we all go through some form of B.S. in our lives. Neways this is a family pattern that isn't going away , but my happy lil family,we can go away,stay away from these people,that don't think the best of us anyway .

That brings me to my lil family :

This is my beautiful daughter Krystal Rose . Yeah , not all the time is she the nicest gal toward me . We're definitely alike LOL! so we do bump heads from time to time . Lately her & I have really understood one another . I can thank her boyfriends mother for that one , because my daughter has a mother n law who's kinda like my M-n-L too! Its funny cuz with all the bad mouthing her parents from my MnL , my mom & then BF's mom , it made her so confused poor thing, that she took a break from school for a whole year to go to a phsycologist ,where the doctor focused on her " BAD PARENTS". After she spent that whole year having a shrink help
her figure her parents out, she came to me one day & said ," Im gonna stop going to my therapist". I then said , " Are you sure , because you know, we messed you up & all (suppositely) & the therapist is trying to help you from our horriblness LOL!" My daughter told me," No mom,I realize that everything that you did was different . I was around musicians who were nice to me , let me hang out with dad in the recording studio,we always went camping,you both were always there for me, the problem happened when we were trying to save my uncle because thats what grandma wanted & dad didn't say no." I looked up to my daughter & saw her face,& right before me was a beautiful girl , that I brought into this world , healing right before my eyes. I realized then ,that its all about allowing the healing process .

Today The Healing Family

This picture makes me happy & probably makes my MnL very angry . This is my daughter & my hubby working together to figure out this really cool camera equipment that my daughter got to rent from her school. OH! I forgot to tell ya that our horrible parenting , got my daughter into CAL-ARTS , this school is the most difficult art school to get into ,& she got in.

Finally Jamie Ridlers wishcast question ," What do I wish to make time for ? "I want to make time for enjoying MY LIL FAMILY! One thing that my daughter & I are in agreement on is my precious grandbaby girl will NEVER know the kind of yukiness that my daughter saw growing up around her uncle. Its creepy cuz my grandbaby is going to turn 3yrs old this weekend , and thats when my MnL started to resent my daughter & my hubby's relationship. My MnL wanted to be the only women in my hubbys life & well now theres 3 girls he loves very much.What my MnL doesn't understand is that my hubby loves his mom very much also & the more she continues this evil family pattern of hers , my hubby is finally understanding that,its about being happy , not dark & depressed all the time.

This is my grandbaby,I hope to be the kind of grandmother my MnL wasn't for my daughter,I will never tell her she's fat, I will never tell her shes a whore or make her think such a thing. I will always tell her to live her dreams! How can any right minded women tell her 3yr old grandchild horrible things , look how precious she is? Just like my daughter was and still is!

The one thing I always have told my daughter , be who you truly want to be . Live your dreams ! When I found out my daughter was pregnant at 16 ,I thought like everyone else , Its Over! Her dreams & aspirations gone! But! Im not one to ever think like that , so I continued to tell her you still can do it! You still can be a filmmaker,don't let anyone tell you otherwise! so the whole family go out & we're the best crew she could ever have I tell ya! For being a "BAD PARENT" , my daughter is still going for her dream! Watch out! You'll be seeing her movies someday.

So as I come to the end of my story , I tell you that , we all have our own pain . Lets learn to rise from it & heal . I will be honest the forgiving part will come in time, Im yet to find it . Healing happens when you stop listening to all those that don't want you to be happy or try to keep you from healing. We need that space to heal and no one is gonna give that to you except YOU! Thats why Im teaching my new e-course called the Travellin' Art Journal Series its FREE!I focus on this kind of stuff , if anyone knows about excepting , letting go,& becoming free from all the judgement, it is this teacher right here. Break through the judgement , the anger , the recentment. Start healing , start loving yourself again !

Here is the 2/3 episode of The Travellin' Art Journal Series please subscribe on the right hand side so you can get the next episode in your email , I hope to see you there !

Thank you Wishcasters for listening . You and Jamie Ridler have always had a place in my heart , you always remind me that Im not alone in the obstacles of life.
We all try to help one another.

Until next time ,
Chao ! XOXO,
MaryannK/4rm Zero

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

The Girl Effect , help these girls have a future.

It's time to make a difference for the girls , who need to have a chance , to have an education , not be sold from their parents for food , to have a choice to be a mother and a wife when they choose ,after they go to college and get a degree. Its time these young girls , children , not walk everyday thinking is my time up as a child , never knowing until it happens , and they are sent off to marry and have children , just an object , not human in those who do this to them . These girls are just things to be sold for their families to survive .
Tara Mohr has put up a blogging campaign, for all bloggers to go on their blogs & tell the message of The Girl Effect Project . After you have blogged for the cause , for these young girls to have a chance for a future of education , and to be a woman who can make her own choices for her,post at Taras blog . Lets make a difference blogger friends !
Thank You ,