About Me

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Hi! My name is MaryAnn , in a nutshell , Im just a city gal who left the city to live life in the desert with dreams and a family I love very much. Im just an artists , tryin' to live my dreams , go where they take me , and just see what happens.

Friday, May 21, 2010

My Happy ! Friday : P

Today is Friday ! Another Jamie Ridler event , called Sharing your Happy , I am so excited to share this happy event because I haven't done it in so long , I was so caught up with my lil world called family that everytime I tried I would have a creative block . Yesterday was a revelation ! I finally broke that barrier and started on a new design for my etsy shop that has been sitting for the last 2 years with nothing crafty I had made . So! I celebrate my Happy , that I got back into my craft designing clothes and purses , bags , I can't wait to let ya all know to go check out my etsy , that will be a future Happy Friday . : P

Have a wonderful Friday everyone and a wonderful weekend and thanks for listening it means alot ! : P

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Wishcast Wednsday : What Do You Wish To Have?

Publish Post It's Wishcast Wedsnday again , I try to put the link where the words change to the link and all you have to do is click on the highlighted words that could take you to the Jamie Ridler site but it does not do it for some reason , if someone can give me a helpful hint on how to do something I know is simple ,yet I can't seem to figure it out I would really appreciate it . Anyways Jamie asks us today what do you wish to have ? Well... I wish to have " Calm " , the last 2 days have been really stressful , and its usually family members who won't figure out things on their own , they always need to bother us with their problems and we most the time , can't help them , their problems are normally stuff they can only take care of , no one can take care of them for them . It leads to stress for my husband and I , it just makes you shut or phones off , so you don't get bothered by the messages of , " I need you to help me !",
My husband and I have really sacraficed many years tryin' to help our family . My mother n law , who couldn't stop giving to her son even when he would lie to her about what he needed the money for and she would give it to him and he would go and buy heroin with it and then she would call us to go and help him , or should I say to save him . We would always get some sort of phone call to save one of them weather it be helping my brother n law or his wife who was also an addict or their son , and we did , we sacraficed our own family to make sure they were ok . We ended up putting both my brother n law and his wife in rehab and took guardianship of their son for 4 yrs , and it was not the easiest thing we had done . In the end we had to send my sister n law to her mother in Nevada because my brother n law couldn't stop looking for her , and when he found her, he would focus on her and not on staying clean . Now this all affected my daughter and our nephew . My daughter ended up falling in love with a boy in high school and ended up pregnant at 16 , which was really hard for us as parents , and all my hubby and I could do was blame ourselves that it was our fault that this happened because we were too busy trying to take care of others , but we had been very close and we always had a family meetings and always asked eachother if we were ok with the decisions we were about to make , and she always said we needed to help them especially her cousin who she saw as a brother more than a cousin , but when she got this boyfriend she felt we weren't right for her , she started to compare her life to others at her school and felt that we were horrible parents because we were always taking care of others in the family but Dave and I were always their for the kids , we made sure they had dinner on the table , we made sure they had done all their homework and when something or someone was bothering them at school , we would talk to them about it so they would feel better about it .
After the kids graduated from high school the whole family fell apart . My nephew Mike , went up north to college and we don't talk to him much . My daughter had her baby who is now a year old and they both live with my daughters boyfriends family and I rarely see her as well . So... I take all this and realize , that I wish for Calm , in my heart to let them all go , not to feel sad , and I know that I will always care for them ,but at the same time I have to let it go, all the pain and they have to figure out life for themselves , but most of all , old patterns must die . In other words my mother n law has to stop bugging us to continue to take care of her recovering addict son , he's 44 yrs old and he's got to learn that he's got to do it for himself now , he's got to work things out with his son , not go through us to do it . I just need and wish for CALM is all .

Thanks for listening everyone , this blog post was pretty heavy for me , but it is what has been on my mind lately because my brother n law has been a problem AGAIN for the last 2 days .

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Wishcast Wednsday : What rules do you wish to make or brake?

Its Wishcast wednesday ! Jamie Ridler ( http://jamieridlerstudios.ca/ )asks what rules do you wish to make or brake ? Well... thats a good one I must say... I have alway been a rebel so I will go with I would like to brake the rules that you have to be a certain way or act a certain way , because society says you have to be a certain way of being to be respected or excepted . What I mean by that is , I want to be able to run outside and spin around in front of everyone on road and be like Julie Andrews in The Sound of Music . I want to not worry about how I look if I don't have make-up on , I don't want to care about what people think if I wear my fun funky clothes that I made to a BBQ . I want to be able to not worry about what people think of my witch hackling laugh because it expresses that Im really having a great time with friends . Thats pretty much it in a nutshell . Being proper all the time is just too much , and I have always broke that rule , in a respectful way of course , but its just so hard for me to be what society thinks you should be to be excepted by the high society type of people , if you met me in person , I look like this hippy chic but you would notice that I am respectful , earthy and sweet , I think you would like me. : P

Thanks for listening !
Maryann k